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Healing exercise for psychological
stress from childhood fate (2) "Accepting
life from parents and protect
yourself" Because you have
been hurt, humiliated or mistreated by your parents. (Hurtful
closeness: Crossing borders of all kinds caused mental wounds) The following
"rite" consists of six elements: 1. Assumption of life from the parents 2. Practice renunciation 3. Life assumption from "mother nature” (for believing people also from God as source of
life) 4. Attachment to the big community of nature 5. Discovery and affirmation of one’s own
originality 6. Responsibility towards the community of nature: Finding one's own vocation and place in the world If possible, you put your own chair in
such a way that the back points to a window as large as possible, through
which you can look into nature. In front of this chair, two other chairs
are positioned on which in your imagination the
parents sit in such a way that they are facing you. While sitting on your own chair, you can
find the appropriate distance for the parents' chairs. If you want, you can
use symbols for the parents or attach photos of them to the chairs to make it
easier to be aware of their presence and thus to facilitate contact with
them. If the parents' behavior was very
different, it is necessary to make this rite once for the mother and once for
the father. Sometimes it is only necessary to do the rite for the parent who is problematic. 1.
Life assumption from the parents Sitting on one's
own chair, one holds both hands open towards one's parents and receives life
itself and everything that one has received from them what is necessary,
pleasant and valuable: "Dear parents (dear father, dear
mother), life has flowed to me from you, without you and without your
relationship to one another I would not exist. I consciously accept my body and my life
as a whole from you! And all that you have given me in the
course of my childhood and youth: in food and clothing, in housing and care
of a mental and material way, everything you have given me, all that was
necessary for me to grow up and become an independent person, I now
consciously accept from you.“ 2.
Building up protection As a child one is extremely
"on reception" and has a fundamental trust in the parents. One has
a very open soul, but it is also very vulnerable. Since you are totally dependent on your parents in every respect, you
can hardly protect yourself from them. Especially parents who do not respect the
originality of their child or even see the child as a kind of possession are
in danger of integrating their child into their own ideas, interests and needs.If the child resists, it is devalued, blackmailed,
manipulated, seduced, violently forced or punished. As a child, you are in danger of being at the mercy
of others and can then become afraid for a lifetime
and may not be able to defend yourself against assaults of any kind from
fellow human beings. Some people then have a lifelong feeling of
inferiority or they get feelings of guilt if they pursue their own interests,
or they feel overstrained as adults against the expectations of their old
parents or also against expectations of other people. Therapeutic rite: The rite of life-assumption (No. 1) is continued
by slowly pulling back the outstretched hands and placing one hand on the
belly and the other on the chest to close and protect the open and wounded
soul. Then close your eyes and feel your body, your sentiments and then your
skin and hands that protect your own inner world. Therapeutic words: I live in me. I am an original of
Mother Nature. Every person is different and may differ from all others,
including parents. No one can fully understand the other and no one is allowed to determine the other’s life - not even the
parents. Everyone is free and independent - and has the task to understand
himself better and better and to develop and show his originality. I do not always have to understand my
parents and they do not always have to understand me. Above all, I don't
have to convince them of my attitude to life and I don't have to defend or
justify how I think and live. I respect my parents as the ones who
gave me life, but now I can and must protect myself from them so that I can
find myself and find my place in the world. In order to comfort the “hurt inner child", one
should later do the rite “Dialogue with the Inner Child” several times: >>> A farewell ritual from the parents would also be
helpful. For this purpose, one should first gather information about the
parents' fate, especially about their childhood: >>> Protect yourself from hurtful
projections of your parents: >>> 3. Life assumption from "Mother
Nature (for believing people also from God as
source of life) 4. And connected with the great
community of nature Then you turn your chair around and look out through
the window into nature. If the window does not offer a view into the nature,
one imagines a wide and beautiful landscape. Later you look for a real
natural landscape and complete this last part of the exercise outdoors
inwardly once again. “I am not only a child of my parents.
The great Mother Nature brought forth all life and
nourishes it and gives it air to breathe. I know myself connected and
part of the great community of Mother Earth.” Possible formulation for religious people: „I am not only a child of my parents.
I am wanted and affirmed by the source of all life and by the source of all
life-affirming forces, which many people call "God". "God" now looks at me with
love and benevolence. By him I am fully and
unconditionally accepted and affirmed. He says YES to my existence and gives
me the consciousness of my absolute dignity and right to exist -
regardless of how other people see and judge me, regardless of what I mean to
my parents. "God" has made my existence
possible through the long development of the universe and through the long
development of life on this earth. Through the great "Mother
Nature", who brought forth the diversity of all living beings, he has
also given me my life. So I
know that I am connected and part of the great community of life on our
earth. I am a "child of God" and a "child of Mother
Earth" and may develop mentally and spiritually and grow up in every
respect: to shape my life independently and responsibly - in connection with
the great community of all life.“ 5. Discovery and affirmation of one´s
own originality „I am a child of Mother Earth and know
about my originality and uniqueness. I am a miracle of nature: No one knows
me completely and comprehensively. I myself have been on the road all my
life to understand myself better and better and to recognize and develop my
physical, mental and spiritual powers and possibilities. In my originality
I am allowed to be different from every other person, different from my
parents too. Therefore my parents do not always need
to understand me. My raison d'ętre and my well-being do
not depend on my parents' thinking, expectations and decisions. But I, too, do not always need to
understand my parents - nevertheless I respect them as mediators of life for
myself and assume my life from them and give them a place in my heart.” 6. Responsibility towards the
community of nature: Finding one's own vocation and place
in the world „Dear parents, you are behind me,
through you life has flowed to me. What I have
received from you may continue to flow forward through me (into my
partnership, into my family) to other people and for the good and blessing of
the great community of life on earth with people, animals, plants, natural
elements, ... I want (I have?) to find my place in
this community of life on earth (Or:
„I have found my place in this community of life on earth ...”) and I
want to unfold my originality and serve the life on this earth.“ I close my eyes, exhale deeply a
few times and let the breath flow deep into me again and feel once again my
connection to the great community of life on earth. Then I stretch my arms
and legs and stand up. Manfred Hanglberger (www.hanglberger-manfred.de) Link to
share: https://hanglberger-manfred.de/en-schutz.htm
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